Her response to my post :
I just read your blog post. I admit I hate it when people say this to me, because HOW but seriously- try to stop worrying about it all. you are YOUNG and there’s plenty of time left for you to get where you’re going.
Honestly, there’s little else you can do other than make the best choice for yourself today, and hope that those choices lead to even better things tomorrow.
I think you should be so proud of your life. You have a high-powered job in one the country’s greatest cities, plenty of friends who are there when you need them (me), and a countless number of men wanting to take you on exorbitantly expensive dates/marry you if you’d let them. I’m proud that you’re my friend and there’s not a shred of doubt that however long it takes, you’ll get everything you want out of life. because that’s who you are, and you deserve it.
Sometimes I think my life moves so fast (my own fault) and I wonder how my choices might differ if I slowed down a bit. Or if I tried to further my career more before getting pregnant. As happy as I am about the baby (and I’m ecstatic), these things still keep me up at night. What if I wake up in 10 years and think, fuck, I never lived in LA/NYC, became a director of a nonprofit and bought myself a killer pair of loubs? One day I might feel that way, who knows… but I know that today I’m making the best decisions for my life with what I’ve got.
I think the point of my rambling is that you can’t worry about the what-ifs or repercussions that are still 10 steps down the line. Focus on what you have control over today and make the best decisions for YOU, because you still have that luxury. I truly believe that when you find what you want out of a location, career, etc. all the other things will just fall into place.
Don’t let anyone pressure you… and might I remind you that I’m flying solo out here with this whole marriage-house-baby thing! I’m lucky to have friends like you that stick by me when I decide to do crazy shit like get pregnant.
I love you, I hope this email doesn’t come off as condescending or like I’m telling you how to feel. I just want you to be happy, SO HAPPY, and fuck anyone who stands in your path to get there.
Thank you, I love you. So much.